


When love is there but it's not enough

by VisiblePetrichor



Category: From Dusk Till Dawn: The Series
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, F/M, I write sins and Tragedies, Unhappy Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-25
Updated: 2018-10-25
Packaged: 2019-08-07 14:31:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,884
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16410227
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VisiblePetrichor/pseuds/VisiblePetrichor
Summary: The one where they can't make it work.





	When love is there but it's not enough

**Author's Note:**

> I've been busy updating my other fics, until they started getting more angsty than I intended. So, I wrote this, with the hope of purging the angst and sadness.
> 
> I honestly just want them to be happy.

He shouldn't be here.  
   
He should not be here.  
   
He should turn back and get the hell out of dodge while he still has his dignity intact.  
   
That it will only end in heart ache. Fucking. Pathetic. Heart ache.  
   
His heart.  
   
His ache.  
   
Every time he listens to Richie and lets himself think that this time will be different. Every time he shows up when she calls, thinking he’ll try again with her. Every time, he always wakes up the next morning - alone - feeling like the biggest fucking asshole on the planet. When he makes it back home afterwards, he swears to himself, to Richie, to whatever other sucker happens to be around that he is fucking done with Kate Fuller. He swears that the next time she calls from a random number and says she misses him, that she needs him, that there is no one on earth who knows her like he does - he'll end that fucking call and go blow off some steam at a bar or strip club, like a normal grown-ass man.  
   
Months later, with one late night phone call from Kate asking, "Can I see you?", and he's outside some crappy motel room in the middle of nothing and nowhere, failing to convince himself to just walk away.  
   
Why can't he man the fuck up and just leave? There's still time to turn back and pretend that none of this happened. That he's finally moved on from her. That he doesn't, after all this time, still dream about waking up to her in his arms.  
   
He spots a pair of eyes peeking through the neighbouring curtains and Seth starts to feel like a creep for standing outside her room for so long. So, he tries the door handle, telling himself that if it's locked that he'll walk away.  
   
He barely turns the knob and the door slides open with ease.  
   
"Seth, is that you?" Kate calls from the bathroom. "There's some pizza and beer on the table for us."  
   
Hearing her voice again, for the first time in months, finally in person... he knows he’s fucking screwed.  
   
"Yeah, I bought some beer too," he says, accepting that there’s no way he’s leaving now and putting his six-pack next to the pizza.  
   
"Seth? You want to eat now or later?"  
   
He turns around to find Kate leaning against the doorframe. She's wearing a pair of silk boxers, a giant white t-shirt, and no evidence of a bra.  
   
At least he doesn't have to pretend that she's here for anything other than sex. He should've known. All the other calls have been about a quick fuck. Why should he expect anything else this time? He’s a fucking idiot for thinking that she actually needed him.  
   
"So, is that outfit because you didn't have change to tip the delivery guy?"  
   
He knows that he’s being an asshole.  
   
He doesn’t care.  
   
She sighs dramatically and rolls her eyes as she walks over to the table, boxing him in. "Snarky comment from Seth Gecko? Wow, that's unexpected," she says, leaning over and grabbing a slice of pizza. She's so close to him that he can smell her apple scented shampoo and it’s making his blood boil.  
   
"You want me to leave, Princess?"  
   
She turns around to give him space and leans against the table like she doesn't have a care in the world. She takes another bite of her slice and says, "You know where the door is."  
   
God, she's always been obstinate and confrontational when it comes to dealing with him. But now she looks for opportunities to fight with everyone. It was worse right after Amaru. After being possessed by the motherfucking Queen of everything unholy, she was never the same again. They tried their best to fit together, as team. Both he and Richie did everything they could to make her feel a part of the family. It worked for a while. Things were good and he finally thought that things were finally turning around for them.  
   
One night, Kate even found her way into his bed.  
   
He should've known that good things don't last forever.  
   
One random Sunday morning, without any warning, Kate took off saying that she doesn't feel like herself and that she needed to be alone.  
   
Weeks turned into months. Months became a year. Now he only sees her when Richie bugs her to come visit or when she calls him unexpectedly for a booty call.  
   
Richie says she just needs time, that she's still hurt and confused, and she's only acting like this as some sort of self-preservation mechanism. Richie also told him to be understanding and not antagonise her. Too bad he's a thankless motherfucker.  
   
"I guess I'll see myself out then," he says as he purposefully leans over her to pick up his six-pack of beer. He turns to leave. If she wants him to stay, then she needs to start acting like it.  
   
Kate wraps her arms around his waist from behind and says, "Okay, Prince Charming. I yield." She tugs up his shirt and finds her way underneath his wife beater. She starts running her fingers up his chest, scratching lightly like she knows he likes. "I've missed you," she says while pressing harder up against him.  
   
"Yeah, I could tell by the dozens of messages you've left over the past few months."  
   
"Aww," she says as she undoes his zipper and reaches into his pants. "Let me make it up to you," she whispers into his ear and nips at his earlobe.  
   
Like that, he's hard already.  
   
Fuck.  
   
Kate spins him around, pushing him up against the table and climbs onto his lap. His pants are sitting somewhere around his knees, he leaves the six pack on what he hopes is the table, and Kate - amazing, too good for him Kate - is slowly grinding in his lap. His hands automatically grip her hips and he squeezes harder than he means to.  
   
She fucking moans out loud.  
   
Why the fuck did he think that he'd win this game of chicken with her?  
   
Kate leans in slowly to kiss him and pulls away at the last second. "Hi," she says with a naughty smirk.  
   
"God, I missed you," he confesses, brushing her hair behind her ears so he can look into her beautiful, green eyes. He threads his fingers slowly through her hair, before pulling her closer towards him and finally getting to kiss her.  
   
"Yeah?" she asks, dipping her head and running her lips up his throat to his lips. "Then, show me, Seth? Please?" She hooks her finger into the collar of his wife beater and pulls him with her as she stands from the table.  
   
He follows her easily, a defeated man accepting his fate. Because he's wrapped up in Kate and not paying attention, he trips in the pants around his knees and falls on his fucking ass. Like an asshole.  
   
Kate laughs out loud, as she offers her hand to help him up.  
   
Fuck, he's missed her laugh.  
   
He gets up quickly and pulls up his pants to prevent further humiliation. "Is something funny, Princess?"  
   
Kate climbs onto the bed and tugs off her T-shirt. He was right, she's not wearing a bra. And the panties she's wearing is a red, lacy pair. She kneels on the mattress and twirls strands of her hair in her fingers. "How about you hurry on over here and find out," she says as she bites her lip.  
   
Before he makes it to the bed, his phone starts ringing. He pulls it out of his pocket to silence the ringer, but pauses when he sees the picture of him and Emily on his screen. It's the selfie she took of them when they spent that weekend away at the beach last month.  
   
"You can answer that, if you need to," Kate says from the bed.  
   
He doesn't know what to do. He told Emily that he'd be swamped on this 'work trip' - shmoozing new suppliers and potential fat cat investors - and he'd call when he had the time. If she's calling, then it must be important.  
   
"I'll be right back," he tells Kate as he walks to the bathroom to answer the call.  
   
"Em, is everything okay?"  
   
"Seth, oh my God. I'm so sorry I'm calling you like this. But our delivery to Jeds got mixed up and my guys are there now but no one's there. And I can't get a hold of Richie. And..."  
   
"Hey, hey, hey," he interrupts her spiralling rant. "Okay. It's okay. I'll give Kalinda a call and she'll be able to help you out."  
   
"No, no. It's fine. Just send me her details and I'll sort it out. I've screwed up enough today."  
   
"Honey, listen to me," he says trying to calm her down. "It's okay. Kalinda will see to the delivery. Everything's fine."  
   
"Gaaaahhh," Emily groans on the other end of the line. "You keep telling me to write things down because my memory sucks, but I thought I had this handled. I'm such a dildo."  
   
"It's just one delivery, Em. Not the end of the world. You are not a dildo."  
   
"Well, I may need to be with you gone for a whole week," she teases.  
   
"Oh, Honey,"  
   
"Seth, before you get carried away," she says, interrupting him. "You have to get back to work and I have to fix this delivery situation. Just call me when you can, okay? Maybe when you're alone in bed and can't seem fall asleep without me."  
   
As if he didn't know before, Seth suddenly realises where he is and what he's doing. His blood runs cold from the guilt he feels.  
   
"Hey, it's okay if you can't," Emily says after he doesn't respond to her. "I know you're busy. I just miss you."  
   
"I miss you too, Em. I'll call soon, okay?"  
   
He sends her Kalinda's details as soon as he hangs up. Emily replies with a bunch of kissing emojis. God, he's an asshole. He likes Emily. She's sweet and fun and he has a good time with her.  
   
He should not fucking be here.  
   
Seth walks out of the bathroom and finds Kate under the bed covers, scrolling through her phone.  
   
"Sorry about that. Mixed up delivery at Jeds."  
   
"That wasn't your girlfriend?" Kate asks, confused expression on her face. "I saw your screen before you answered the call."  
   
"Err, yeah," he says, walking over to sit next to Kate on the bed. "She, uhm… Her dad is our condiment supplier. She had to take over things when he got really sick a few months ago."  
   
"That's nice," she says as she places her phone down on the nightstand. "She looks pretty. Have you two been going out long?"  
   
"Kate, no. Don't do this."  
   
"I'm not doing anything. I'm just asking about your girlfriend."  
   
"No," he replies. He’s tired from the long drive here, tired of all the shit in his life, tired of all the games he has play just to see Kate, and he can’t pretend anymore that this is normal. "You don't get to ask about her, okay? You don't... Can you just for once..." He stands up from the bed to pace around the room, because he can't think straight. He could never think straight when it came to Kate, but she's pretending that everything between them is hunky frikken’ dory and it's pissing him off.  
   
"You know, when you call, I always show up. Like a fucking chump. And I think that maybe this time you'll be ready to stay."  
   
"Seth,"  
   
"And what do you do… Every fucking time? You pretend that all of this is normal. That we can just fuck when you need it and then you leave. You're gone like the wind before the sun's even up and I don't hear from you until your next booty call. Every. Fucking. Time."  
   
"Seth," she says as she starts wrapping the bedsheet around her and getting out of the bed.  
   
"No, Kate. I’m done pretending. I fucking knew this was a stupid idea. What are you even doing here, Kate? No, don't answer that. I don't care. I'm leaving." He pats down his jeans, trying to find his keys so he can get the hell out of here.  
   
"So, my boyfriend's name is Josh," Kate says suddenly. She’s never told him about boyfriends before. They never really talk when they meet up.  
   
What kind of jerkoff has the name 'Josh' anyway?  
   
"He is sweet," she continues. "He treats me well. He's incredibly generous. And he's amazing in..."  
   
"Okay, I don't need to know that."  
   
"In soccer, Seth. He's amazing in soccer."  
   
"And why do I give a shit?"  
   
"Seth, he loves me and wants to marry me."  
   
That stops him. Dead.  
   
Kate. Married.  
   
Kate. Married. To some church-going Jesus-freak named Josh.  
   
Seth can't think straight. He can't think at all.  
   
She'll have his kids. Move to the suburbs and live behind a white picket fence. She’ll finally live a normal life like he always wanted for her.  
   
A normal life without his sorry ass in it.  
   
"He asked me a few days ago and I didn't know what to say. So, I told him that I needed time to think about it and I that I was going to visit Scott for a few days."  
   
"And you somehow called me instead? Last I checked, Scott has a different number." She's moved into his space again. The smell of apples is overwhelming.  
   
"You were on the way."  
   
She takes another step around him, so she can look him in the eye.  
   
"So, this is one last fuck, for old times’ sake, huh?"  
   
She looks almost hurt by his remark, as she shakes her head slightly. "Seth, that's not what this is and you know it."  
   
He's too fucking tired and annoyed to feel sorry for her. He's done letting her set the rules for everything. Tonight, he’s getting fucking answers. "Then what is this, Kate? Why do we keep doing this? What do you want from me?"  
   
"Seth," she says, retreating back to the bed with parts of her sheet trailing behind her. "What do you want me to say? You know what I went through with Amaru. I tried to be normal but I felt so broken. I didn’t know how to fix it. So, I left."  
   
"That's it?” he almost shouts. “You're gone for months at a time and that's the best you got? Richie still has these nightmares, where..."  
   
He pauses when he can see that her eyes are welling up from unshed tears. She's sitting on the edge of the bed, looking forlorn and desperate.  
   
He sighs and runs his hand through his hair as he takes a few steps towards her. He doesn't want to upset her, but this is the most he's gotten out of her months and he’s not stopping. “Kate, you know that none of us made it out unscathed.”  
   
"I never meant to hurt you, Seth. Maybe I shouldn't call anymore."  
    
"Why do you still call?" he asks softly, trying not to spook her.  
   
She offers him her hand and leads him to sit next to her on the bed.  
   
"I don’t want it to be hard to be stay with you, but Seth. I also can't seem to give you up," she says as she strokes his knuckles.  
   
"Kate, stop," he says trying to pull his hands away.  
   
"It's true, Seth," she pleads, pulling his hands harder.  
   
"Then why did you never ask me to come with you?"  
   
Kate brings his hands to her chest and laying them over her heart so he can feel the beats. "You know the reason, Seth. I've seen what happens when you and Richie are apart. I don't want to go through that again."  
   
"It's not like that anymore, and you know it," he says, pulling his hands back.  
   
"When I'm with you, Seth," she continues in earnest. "I don't want to leave again. Honestly, I don't. But I can’t help that seeing you reminds me of what I went through. With you, I'm always going to be the girl who died at the blood well and got possessed by the queen of Hell. When I’m away, with Josh, I get to be someone new."  
   
"Bullshit."  
   
"No, Seth. You know that I'm still the scared girl in the Twister who you promised would make it out without any bumps or scrapes."  
   
"Bull fucking shit, Kate. No one sees you like that."  
   
"Really? Then what am I to you if I'm not the little girl you had to save, once upon a time?"  
   
"You... Kate. You're my partner."  
   
He watches closely as Kate closes her eyes and tears start falling down her cheeks.  
   
"Seth, this is all I can give you for now and maybe it's all that I'll ever be able to give you. If you're not okay with that, I'll stop calling." She offers him a sad smile. It’s like the one she had in the car in Mexico that night that he left her on the side of the road.  
   
He ducks his head to rest it against her shoulder, because he doesn't know what else to do.  
   
Fuck. Who is he kidding? He gave up on Kate. How could he possibly think that he could again? If he only ever gets random nights with her for the rest of his life, then that's what he'll take. He never deserved happily ever after with her.  
   
She starts threading her fingers through his hair. Along his hairline, at his temples, and pressing her fingers along the tense muscle in his neck.  
   
"I’m sorry, Kate," he whispers at some point. He can't think straight when applies pressure to a certain point at the base of his skull.  
   
"I know," she says, kissing the top of his head. "I'm sorry, too." She kisses the back of his neck.  
   
"Kate,"  
   
"I love you, Seth" she confesses to him in a whisper.  
   
"Then don't leave." He fucking hates how pathetic he sounds when he asks her to stay.  
   
Kate tilts his chin, forcing him to sit up again.  
   
She caresses his cheek, his jaw, his lips. "Seth, I can't promise how I'll feel tomorrow. But I know that for tonight, there's no place I'd rather be than right here with you."  
   
She starts kissing him again. Slowly. Softly. Almost hesitantly.  
   
"Do you want me to stop?" she asks pulling back from him slightly.  
   
His voice catches in his throat and all he can do is shake his head. He’s a pathetic moron.  
   
"Kate, I lo..."  
   
"No, Seth," she says as she presses her hand over his mouth. "Good boyfriends don't profess their love for other women."  
   
He's the furthest thing from a good boyfriend. He has Kate, here, right in front of him and he’s not going to waste it.  
   
"Sweetheart. One thing I have never been, is good." He lifts her into his lap as he kisses her. Things get intense very quickly. He shuffles them around to get Kate on the bed, and she giggles when he drops her on the mattress.  
   
Fuck. She’s perfect.  
   
He tries to pry the sheet off while he crawls over her, but Kate tugs the sheet back out of his hands. "You first, Mister. I think you have a few too many pieces of clothing on." She's staring back at him, defying him to fight for his way.  
   
He grabs her hands roughly, pins them above her head, and kisses her before she can protest.  
   
She fights him a little, wriggling to try to get out of his grip. But he's a lot stronger, she doesn't stand a chance. They both know it, but she gives it a good shot.  
   
"I think you're enjoying this too much," Kate says as he starts kissing down her neck.  
   
"Are you not enjoying yourself, Princess?" he asks, nipping at her collar bone.  
   
"Enough teasing, Seth," she says, squirming against him. "I want you naked."  
   
"Mmmm, naked," he says, shifting up to whisper in her ear. With Kate's hands still pinned above her head, he frees one hand to finally pull that wretched sheet off of her.  
   
At some point earlier, without him knowing, Kate took of her panties. He must have a dumbass expression on his face, because she's pursing her lips to stop herself from laughing. God, why hasn't he had her naked since he walked in?  
   
He runs his fingertips lightly down her sternum, drawing loose patterns on her belly. He’s purposefully taking his time, trying to enjoy every second that he has with her.  
   
"Seth, please," she moans for his attention.  
   
He gives her a quick peck on the lips while he walks his fingers down towards her...  
   
Kate flips them over suddenly, straddling him triumphantly with the biggest shit-eating grin he's ever seen on her. She follows up her win with a slow, decisive grind of her hips. "Enjoying yourself?"  
    
He's so fucking screwed.  
   
Literally.  
   
He thinks that he's still dreaming when he wakes up the next morning and realises that Kate is still wrapped up in his arms. He's uncomfortable because her hair is in his face and her leg is squeezed awkwardly between his legs. But fuck, he wouldn't give up this moment for any score on Earth.  
   
While she's here, he can pretend that she'll never leave.  
   
He risks running his knuckles across her collar bone, because he needs to touch her and check that she’s real. He strokes along her bicep, before walking his fingers towards her waist.  
   
"Mmmm, I could get used to this," Kate says as she nuzzles into his chest before blinking her eyes open.  
   
"You like that, huh?" he asks, circling his fingers around her hip.  
   
"Mmmm. I do."  
   
"And this?" he asks, poking her in her waist.  
   
She gasps and flinches at his touch, but he doesn’t stop. They tumble around in the bed as he tickles her relentlessly.  
   
"Seth, stop! God!" she yells in between her screeching with laughter.  
   
Fuck, he loves her laugh.  
   
He pins her hands above her head when he finally stops teasing her.  
   
He bends to kiss her then pulls back at the last second.  
   
"You want to have your way with me, Mr Gecko?" Kate asks with a naughty smirk.  
   
He drops his forehead to hers, breathing in the smell of her apple shampoo.  
   
"Kate, I love you. Every time you call, any time you call, if ever you need me… I will always answer. I will always be there. I will always come find you."  
   
Kate lifts her head to nuzzle into the crook of his neck. “I’m sorry that I have to leave again, Seth. Can you forgive me?”  
   
“I forgive you,” he answers. And no matter what happens with them, or how difficult things are, he always will.  
  
At some point, he falls asleep and when he wakes, there is no trace of Kate.  
  
He's alone.  
  
He's disappointed.  
  
He feelings like a moron for getting his hopes up, and tries to get back to his life without her.  
  
The next he hears of her, is the day they get an invite to Kate's wedding to some fuckboy named Josh.


End file.
